Saturday, 6 December 2008

Just a rambling post from me

Huuuu...when i got up this morning, i was so lazy to take off my sleeping blanket on my yummy body (LOL!!). So this morning i was in dilemma, hahahaha..actually i do not know whether i should go to class or not (blame my self coz i know i shouldn't think about it..i know i must go to the IBM class). Well, actually it was silly dilemma. Hahaha..I know i'm not in mood to go to class since yesterday. However, i haven't make up my mind yet.

Actually the reasons are the lecture was so boring and the lab is so very cold (haven't go to UK yet!!lol!!). So yesterday i was thinking to myself (belum di UK suda mati kesejukan..belum lagi di UK..hahhaa). Anyway, at the end of my silly dilemma i decided not go to class. I dont know..i just feel so lazy and really not in mood to learn something today. I really want to be free and dont want to think anything. I was so tension with my life's dilemma. To take the job offer or to take the master degree offer. Oh shit!!! i hate to think about it. I really hate to think about it. Actually, sometimes i feel regret because i applied the job.

Shit myself if i take the offer or if i take off the offer (nah...another silly alias crap talk frm me). Fuck off!!! sorry i'm "merapu" again today. I didn't mean it but i hate to (i have no choice). So i was on my little matt this morning and my left brain squeezing my right brain to think another things. U know what? Huh!!!! to be honest, i really don't want to leave someone i love if i fly to the UK. But when i rethink about my ambition, it seems like i have to take the offer. Well folks, actually my original plan was to be a lecturer that is why i was so excited to futher my studies.

So yesterday i went to my Prof's office and had some discussion with her regarding to the offer. So i told her everything about the offer and she really encourage me to take the offer, however she adviced me to do some inquiries first. So i met my another lecturer, she is head programme coordinator and discussed the same thing. Oh yeah..i'm tired of it. My brain keep thinking about it every single second. FUCK OFF!!!! I'm tired thinking about it. OK..now my family, i called my mom. And my mom said "ko mo pigi karaja sana england kah? (do you want go to the UK for a job?)...Opss.....i felt dying...my heart "danced"..and i said.."macam mana mami tau?" (moom, how did u know?)...and mom replied "Kakak ko bagitau" (your sister told me)..nah...OMG...why she told mom...why...why...why...!!!!!!

I do not mind, but not the right time to tell my mom and dad yet. I will tell them personally when I get back. So my mom gave me "yellow light" (mom haven't make up her mind yet)...so my sister work as a teacher at KM...she also doesn't agree but at the end of our conversation she said yes (Thanks God). Now my sister who is teacher also at SM John Tuaran. Nah....i got head ace with her..she advised me like i never been advised before. "Mami sama Bapa makin tua tuh..kau lah yang jaga dia sebab ko tuh anak bongsu..." (mom and dad is getting older..you are the one have to take care of them)...nah...dead shit!!!

My sister talking crap to me (maybe there is a truth of it). But i think to myself...i always love my parents and always remember them, but i don't want because of them i have to stay with them and can't go anywhere. I have my future and I have my ambition. I need to start my first step in my life. My sister said "Adik, jauh sangat tuh..inda paya lah ko pi sana...kalau ada apa2 susah nanti ko mau balik". I'm so sorry but most of my sisters are very traditional thinking. I know there is a truth of it, but sometimes we have to be brave in doing something.

We do not know until we tried. If something happened, thst is what we called experience. (Sorry to say but this is my way). So i ask my another sister. She has her own business and she said YES but becareful. She is very sporting and her thought is almost like mine. She is very brave in doing something. Another sister. She is work in HQE KK. Well...this is very different. She said "Bah ambik bah..tapi kalau suda jadi kaya jangan lupa kami..and she laughed" (take it! but do not forget us when getting rich)....i know she is a little bit silly..very open minded actually.

Argh.....made me headace actually!!! So back to my original plan, to be a lecturer..I asked my Prof how mush is the basic salary for lecturer. And she said RM4000 ++. Wow...that is good enough. Master degree's offer letter is in my hand. So what shall i do? Continue study and be a lecturer???? So i think again about my salary if i take the offer...converted to to malaysia currency it is about RM15000(depends on the exchange rate). Wow...thats good money!!! Accomadition and transport will be provided. Good enough i think!! So yesterday and last night i was looking for my flight ticket direct from KL to London. And return way tickets about RM8000 -RM12000. I did checked Malaysia airlines, Cathay pacific, Singapore airlines, British airlines, Emiriates airline.

In fact, some of the airlines will stop at Dubai and also Hong Kong and the to London. Well..i do not mind about the price, because the company will pay for it. But i do mind the very long journey...argh!!!! (scary actually). So i was so tired to think about it and Got up and had my shower this morning. I picked up my dirty chlotes and put into my beg. Hahaha...took the train from shah alam and go to the terminal station. Now i'm currently in the termanal station and waiting my bus. Sorry dudes, i have to be rambler today. I was so boring and i really need to empty my mind. I think this is my longest post I've written.

2 comments:

Beck the BandagedKnees said...

hehe andrik.. its cool if u like to compose long post baa.. ^_^ so.. today u supposed to hav classes kaa..? ^_^ hehe its cool baa.. lol i took extra holiday every weeks to get rid of any tension aswell.. lol.. ^_^ so..

still u having that job thingy dilemma eh..? :P hmm think wise u know it better only that.. not all things that u can grab very easily there are some part that u hav to sacrifices and there is other parts that u hav to struggle to get it right! .. however i know its sux.. if u tried but STILL it not meant for u.. :P juz.. be prepare laa.. okay hun!? ^_^

sorry not good in giving advices as i do need some too.. lol

"...i always love my parents and always remember them, but i don't want because of them i have to stay with them and can't go anywhere. I have my future and I have my ambition. I need to start my first step in my life. .....I know there is a truth of it, but sometimes we have to be brave in doing something."
^_^ i totally agree wif u n yup i dare to say i felt this shit before.. at the end.. im relaxing my ass at home.. waiting for my time to strikes.. n at this moment.. :P I enjoy my time.. not mean that I cant strike bout this ambition later.. but I will SOON get the right time n strike back hun.. ;) ..if they’re talking bout unsecure places; they should know that.. we r in unsecure zone.. even if we’re around relative.. ;) shit always happen.. so y don’t we try to gamble till we feel satisfy..? right..? all the best andrik! :)

C.Alv.B said...

Take arest dulu la bh. Tu kepala pun rest juga tu heeeheheh. Nanti klu ko sampai di UK nanti..jammed sdh tu otak wakakkaka..have good rest weekend!!

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