I feel Fresher and enegretic

An ready for anything!!

Wow...it seems like a lovely day again today. I just hope that i am going to enjoy it again. Well, we're going to climb the hills today..lol! Mmmm..when i got up this morning i felt fresher and even now i feel energetic again after my long walk, sun tanned and it was tiring yesterday. I had my simple dinner last night and i went to bed about 11 pm. What?? 11 pm? very unusual..really..i usually will have go to bed about 2 or 3 am. But because i was very tired last night i went to bed about 11 pm. Well...nevermind..i got up about 8 am this morning and had my shower and everything and now on my friend's laptop updating my blog while my friends are getting ready for today's activities.

Anyway..anyway...i logged into my forex account today and it seems like the market is just still droppping down which is good for my Ringgit (RM) because i can get more value in pounds. YES!!! But not really a good idea for my forex because i see one position has been opened up above and am not sure how it will do unless the pounds recovered. Anyway..seeems like headging is the way to safe it.

OK..OK...i gotta go now and seems like all are ready. Take care folks and bye x

Two different people are in love

The art of two different people but i never understood

Last night i was in the laying on the bed and i've got a message from my friend in malaysia and telling me something about the person. Telling me that the person has someone and happier now. Well, i wish the person is happier now and i wish that he is better than me and if he doesn't i am always here. My feeling was brusting last night..huh...what a life. So sad isn't? Anyway..that's how life goes and all those things should make you even stronger to go ahead to the next step of your life.

Telling you this, how if there are two very different people are falling in love but one of them too scared to have the relationship? Maybe until the right moment, then it will bring too much meaning for the other person. The first person is far away came to the second person's place. Very different culture, very different ages, very different background...almost everything is different but the first person likes the second person. Unfortunetly, it seem like it will never works.

These two very different peopele are so scared to have such a relationship because they have been hurt before. Both are so cautious for the next relationship as they dob't want to be hurt again. Well..well.well...isn't crazy?

Anyway....today am going to do something intresting actually. I didn't plan it but it came last minute to me so i just will do it. Hehehehe...shall i say i like to go for climbing? yeah.. i like to do that. At the same time i am still waiting for the company to assign to me a project. I am s0 excited for it because it is very important to my CV later when i'm going to apply for a job. Well, next next i should have a meeting with the company to i gotta go to Heathrow.

Well, the weather is lovely today and thanks God for the hot weather. I am going to enjoy it!!! yeah....mmm...ok folks am going out now and get ready..:) bye x

Just my silly thoughts tonight

It was two days i have been very very busy..went here and there..meeting friends, interview, call conference, etc.....so many things happened this week. Even on my mind, it's so crowded. Life, love, money, friends, study, everything.....argh...anyway..next week i should be going to the company again. Maybe to meet up the client and maybe will have a few discussions. I hope i can do my best for this first company i'm working with in the UK. This is very important to me when i graduated from my master degree. I really hope to be able to work here in the UK because the money is so good. Well, u know what...it's not being money minded but who can live without money? I don't believe it when someone says money is not important and they said money can't make u happy. Well. u can't buy love with money but i'm sure u can make people happy with money.

Second thought was about falling in love with someone. Just imagine..two different people falling in love each other but the first one is a rich one and the second one is just an average person. The rich one loves the average one but the average one feels so small when they were meeting each other. Do you think it will work? It doesn't work i guess....

Anyway, my third thought was about my future..i am so concern about my future..who doesn't? unless u just want to live like the others. I want to have a good standard of living and i want to have my own properties, cars, love and all the things that in my dream. Sometimes i am thinking whether what i'm doing now is really worth for what i have invested or not. Whether it will change my standard of life or not. I don't know...i just hope when i'm doing now is something valuable.

Huh..guys, a lot of things on my mind at the moment and i just hope as the time goes, all those questions will be answered. Anyway..i am missing someone very very much and i really do miss this perosn. It makes me so down and a bit sad. I didn't hear from this person for about a few months. It's killing me softly...

Take care guys, am out now and will write again soon....

The hurt is so bad and i can't take it any longer

Loving someone who wants to be your friend..what do u feel?

I am back again after a long boring day. Well, not really boring, but it was me so fussy...I hope i could find a part time job as soon as possible. Mmmm....i can't just sit and do nothing or mess around with my laptop. It's horrible..i like to do any job that i can work from home :)

So i am free and i can do my work from anywhere. Mmmm...i should do some research about my master's thesis/dissertation but i just not in mood to squeeze my brian at the moment. Well, if i do programming job in have to squeeze my brain to solve but not to find originality. Finding disseratation's title means finding something original (for me).

Well, well...i don't know...but suddenly i feel so sad and missing someone very much today. Yeah, i know very wired but...what to do. I was trying to forget it because i knew it's not gonna happen but..the more i try to forget it....my heart breaking even more..so how could i resist it?I've got this feeling since this afternoon and now about 11.30 pm UK time, it's getting worse. I want to see, i want to tell, i want to hold, i want to hug, i want to kiss...lol (sorry i am a bit naughty).

Anyway..i hope tmrw i will be able go to the gym and move my fatt ass..lol!!!!

Someone Told me....was it true?

Hi All, just a simple and short post...just want to ask you all. Was is true that another part of love is to let it go from you and let it go to someone else? And they said, its the hardest part of Love. Really???

Things happened to me today

1. My friend suggested me a very complex SQL query to solve my problem

sql="SELECT TETRA_TETRA_MR8_6_BARTEX_DB.cycle.cy_cycle,TETRA_TETRA_MR8_6_BARTEX_DB.cycle.cy_cycle_id,

TETRA_TETRA_MAIN_DB.cycle.cy_cycle,TETRA_TETRA_MAIN_DB.cycle.cy_cycle_id

FROM TETRA_TETRA_MR8_6_BARTEX_DB.cycle, TETRA_TETRA_MAIN_DB.cycle

WHERE TETRA_TETRA_MR8_6_BARTEX_DB.cycle.cy_cycle LIKE 'MR5.8.11'

OR TETRA_TETRA_MAIN_DB.cycle.cy_cycle LIKE 'MR5.8.10'

ORDER BY TETRA_TETRA_MR8_6_BARTEX_DB.cycle.cy_cycle, TETRA_TETRA_MAIN_DB.cycle.cy_cycle ASC"

Some of you don't know this but if you really wanted to be a dangerous hacker you must know this stuffss.......Unfortunetly it doesn't solve my problem

2. I got strange error of the system that i've developed

Microsoft OLE DB Provider for Oracle error '80004005'

ORA-03113: end-of-file on communication channel

Well, the problem was because the query was too long. How to solve?? contact DBA...my manager blur..LOL

3. I am tension at this moment but the good thing is my friend invites me to have dinner at the E&O hotel tonight. So i will go of course...

4. I went to c.Alv's blog and i found a song titled if i forget on her blog thouched my heart. It's really a wonderful song and represents about myself at this moment.

If i forget to say I Love you, It doesn't mean that i don't (what a beautiful lyrics huh?) ...i think i fall in love with this song.

Current Mode is Hinava

Credit to hungerhunger.blogspot.com 

Yummm...yum.....i don't know but suddenly i feel wanted to eat hinava. Oh shit!!! i really forgot to ask my family to bring some from sabah last week. I asked them to bring some Jinaruk, Bosou, Salted fish, chili and Tuhau. And they did! which is very good for me. Awwwww...i tell you when i was at the hotel, i ate like i never eat anything for almost a week. It was very very tasty. But one thing i forgot was Hinava. Now i am not busy as i complated another tool today after a few days strugling on it. Hehehe. Lepas siap tool, i checked my email and got emails and one of them was from my friend which is in Germany. And he asked me what is the popular food in Sabah. And i wrote back he must try Tuhau and also Hinava. WHAT????? HINAVA???? exectly! now i realise that i missed it when i was in KL because i did not ask my family to bring some for me. Huhuhu..."crying now"!!! I have Tuhau but don't have Hinava. But never mind because my sister and her family will be comming in Penang this month so i could ask them to take some for me. Huhuhu!!!!! Well, even though i've been almost 6 years here in peninsular malaysia, but i never forgot my root and my originality. As long as i eat Tuhau, Hinava, Jeruk bambangan and Bosou, it shows i am produly still a KADUS.

My Degree Graduation day

Oh...its been 2 weeks i did not update my blog. First of all, the first week i was so busy. Well, when my manager knew i will be out of office on the 28th and 29th of May, he asks me many things to do. So i have no choice, what i've done i have to finished all the tasks assigned to me. So, since i was very tired i really don't have time to update my blog bah. I got back from work i just had my shower and dinner and went to bed and sleep. Huh.....and the worst thing was he gave me last minute project. OMG!!!! but i explained to him i could not finish it until june because i have to be in KL for my graduation day. Lucky my manager is understanable person. Otherwise....memang begaduh lah!!!

My nieces and nephew having bath in the swimming pool

Me with my younger nieces at KLCC park

Yeah..it brother and sister. Do we look similar?

Me again..huhuhu...

Yeah...so many isn't? So glad they came far from sabah just for my graduation day...

Well, my mom and dad. Thanks God for the healthy given to them.

Anyway, my family came to KL last week for 4 days 3 nights. So memang just like almost 10 years never meet, sedangkan baru tahun lepas berjumpa. Huhuhu....And the good thing is they brought me ikan masin, bosou, tuhau, lada gorang campur bawang and junaruk bambangan. What the heck??? very very tasty. Huh.....I ate berpingan-pingan. Mmmm..we stayed in KL and it was three rooms hotel. I mean its like an apartment with 3 bedrooms. But i thought still a bit cram....if u know what i mean. Because we were 12 all togather. I think I have to find the the 4 bedrooms. Mmmmm.....some of them have to sleep on the sofa. What a pity but they don't care especially my nieces and nephews. They are ROCK!!!!! Love them.

It was a long and tiring days for me. I got back to Penang about 6 am and i had my dinner and went to bed. Monday morning, i thought i should take some more rest. I had jet leg. Huh....Even now, i am writing this post, i still a bit tired since last week. Wish i have one week leave.

Master Degree and My job in the UK

First this is my latter of offer for master degree. I should be doing my Master in IT at this moment. My course cose suppose to be CS770.

My Latter of offer for postgraduate studies...i misss it so much.

Here is the file has been sent by Orbix company. Everything is here all the agreement is here. I still keep the file anyway!

Its a letter for me to clarify about my position, salary, transport, accomadation, etc.

Look at the date 25th of NOV 2008. I was doing my DB2 professional certificate that time. I've been offered by a company from the England already. I was so happy and excited but it ends up with sadness when my family did not agree with my decision.

First of all, I really hate to publish these two things. I really wanted to forget about it because .....honestly, i did incorrect decision this year. I really don't know why refused these two gold oppurtunities. I should not decide to take the job in Motorola. What can i say????? I hate for what i've decided. I hate myself and i blame myself and i never forgive myself for what i've done. This is what i call regretness. As my previous post about 5 things make you sad in the world, and one of them si REGRETNESS. Should I blame my family as well because they did not encourage me? Or should i blame myself because i wasn't independent at that time? FUCK OFF LIFE!!! Now i'm feeling very sad. Now i realize that what i've done is BULL SHIT!!!!! I should take my master degree or take the job in the UK. God gave me oppurtunities but I REFUSED IT GRUMPLY!!! I should say sorry for GOD. He gave me the best choices but i was so stuborn to make my own way. God gave me the best ways but i wanted to create my own way. I was so grumpy that time. Now i'm feel regret. Its too late!!!!!

But i promised to myself i will never let the second chance to go away. I will grab it! I know i have the skills i know i am brilliant and i know i am good.

Tulung lah...my hari monday nie gila oh!!!

Punya main siok kalau sia dapat holiday mcm tuh perempuan di atas...di atas japal layar nie...ada spek lagi...mesti siok tuh kan? hehehe

Nah, mimang lah ari nie sia bilang sia makan gaji buta. Punya main busan sia di opis nie.

Ntah lah, usually on monday i will be one of the busiest motorolans. But today was totally bored. My manager just called me couple of time and he just want me to do something very small which is very easy. After that, i have nothing to do on this office.Well, maybe because my manager realized i completed my tasks earlier, so its ben 2 days i came to the office just to tunjuk muka. Padahal, gosh...it was so boring. Sometimes, i thought...mmmmm kalau siap awal nie karaja bosan juga  nie nanti tiada yang mau dibuat. So what i've done today is mostlycalled here and called there. And i don't like it because i will end up with rm0 cridet. 

Huhuhu..kalau mau kacau kawan pun...yalah....durang kan buat karaja takanlah pula sia mau pi kacau kan? hehehehe. So i just messing around with my laptop and browsing internet. So i was looking for  servised apartment in KL just now since my family will be coming in KL on the 28th of May. Besalah bah graduation day bah kunun. And kalau sikit ndah palah..nie 12 urang yang datang.Terpaksa sia ambik serviced apartment 4 bedrooms. Tuh pun no one available. Kalau adapun yang jauh-jauh ngan twin towers. So by hook or by crook i have to book 3  bedrooms apartment and the cost is RM450 per night. Alahai...matilah sia membayar. Kalau one night jah i don't mind lah..nie 4 nights beb di KL. Durang bilang mau jalan-jalan lagi kunun.

Nah...ndah ko merasa?sewa jah mau RM2000 bah sia abis...huhuhuhu...pas tuh diurang bilang mau makan di restoran KL tower. So i made my survey and it costs about RM98++ per head. Kalau 12 urang campur sia lagi...13 urang nie....dinner jah pun abis RM1300. Atuk....ndah ko sakit kepala mau pikir? Anak anak buah sia lah tuh..diorang bilang uncle suda karaja so diorang minta spend banyak-banyak. Huhuhuhu....but even though i spent quite a lot but i don't really mind because i spend the money to may family. Mind you even tambang tiket jah pun sia abis RM5000 bah...trus sia layak menyertai praduan Standard Charted Bank. Kalau menang dapat TV plasma kunun atau, home theatre atau iPod MP3 player.

Kalau menang salah satu..mimang rezeki lah tuh..even though i never trust about luck atau rezeki nie. Cuz i knew i never have luck or rezeki except i strive too much.Oh..whatever!!! nie mau pulang suda rumah....bubyeeeee....

Another bad experiences story

Kalau sekali tengok mcm kat oversea jah...tup-tup kat Langkawi jer pun..tapi Over the sea juga lah..hehehe

aRGH....first of all, i am really full because i just got back from hotel had my dinner.
As usual every thursday, if i'm not too tired or lazy i will got to a place and treat myself
there with nice foods. Tonight the foods were nice though. Secondly i am extreemly tired today. I was so busy extending the defect management tool in the office and i still have a lot to do. So i will continue it tommrow. Anyway, i still go to the hotel becausei already promised my friend to go there and have dinner.

When I opened my 'wired' folder titled pictures in Langkawi. So i looked each of the pictures and lastly i saw this picture which i think seems like i was in Germen or maybe in France or somewhere in oversea. Well, i still remember i went to Langkawi with my friend, this area is full with westerners and most of them own a ship. You can see the ships behind me own my westerners. So i can say this place is visited by rich man. Anyway, so we decided to have dinner at this place and its worth bloody RM50 for just 2 meals. We just had chicken and potato. Oh!!! shit!! Bloody expensive. That is my very bad experience when i was in Langkawi last year and second one is my friend forgot to switch off the car's lights and when we got back the batery was flat. So??? We have to buat muka 5 sen and ask the brother-brother at there tuk cas batery kereta kami...mimang bikin malu!!! tapi tahan-tahan jah kami!!

I Prefer money instead of LOVE

If you were given a choice money or love. What do you think would be your answer? Do you think you will choose money? Or maybe do you think you will choose a love? Or maybe both? Or maybe none of them? Well, you can see my pool on the right side of my blog. So far the vote says money.

Well, if i were given a choice money or love. I will consider how much the person able to pay me instead of love. Let say RM100k? OK fine i would like to consider. Yeah..i always think money is so important. I did not say love is not important...BUT if i were given a choice weater money or love i will defenately pick the money. It does mean i am "mata duitan?". NO...i have my own point why i prefer money instead of love. I NEVER USE SOMEONE JUST TO GET MONEY FROM HIM OR HER. For example wanted to be her lover or his friend just because to get money from him/her. I never steal someone else's money.

YES..you are correct I am so greedy for money but I WILL USE MY EFFORT IN DOING SOMETHING and be paid in return. I was in the bakery shop last sunday and i was reading Star newspaper. I saw the article titled MONEY CAN'T BUY YOU A HAPPINESS. So i was reading this article. It was very intresting. However, after I finished read it, i come out with my conclusion. OF COURSE MONEY CAN'T BUY YOU A HAPPINESS BUT MONEY CAN MAKE YOU HAPPY!!! (Am i correct? I think so). Love can't buy a love because love is unmeasured thing. How are you gioing to buy a love? RM100 per kilo? How are you going measure it? Just like your feeling. So as a conclusion, anything invisible and inmeasurable si un-buy-able (or maybe priceless).

Just imagine your life without money and your life without love. Lets say without love first. In my personal opinion in this era of life, if you do not have love but you have a lot of money you still can be happy. Correct? Because with your money you can go and travel around the world. You can go to any expensive restaurants and have fun with girls/guys. So there is hapiness actually. Maybe long lasting. But at least there is a piece of happiness.

So how about life without money? I WILL BE NOT HAPPY ALL THE TIME. I need chlotes, want to go to somewhere nice, want to eat at the nice restaurants. I want to enjoy my life. But how to enjoy life? NUMBER ONE IS WE SHOULD HAVE MONEY. I know we can enjoy ourself with other things. But sometimes, it needs money. Make love doesn't need money? YEAH correct, you are right but do you want to make love on a smell bed or on a terrible room? NO isn't? need a nice place then we could enjoy it (lol...mcm pernah).

So here is a little bit explanation about how important money instead of love. I did not say love is not important, but i'd say money is number one and love is number two. In this era of life, money usually come first and always come first. Well, i write this post because i had an argument with my friend which is important..love or money. And i'd say money and he said love. How about you?

You told me lies, you made me cry

You ruin the relationship. Why? You told me lies and you made me cry. You lie me from the first time i met you in my life. You lied me all the times. You hurt me too much. You took away my life and you throw it into the dark sea. You said you love, but why hurt? You said you miss but why lie? You said you want but why separate? You said happiness but why sadness? You its nice but why pain? You stab me, you kill me, you hurt me, you sink me, you destroyed me, what else? You can do whatever you want.....just do...let me die and please finish it.

Warkah terakhir-Maafkan pemergianku sayang

Sayang, maafkan ku kiranya warkah ini menyakiti hatimu. Seandainya mampu ku undurkan masa silamku, takkan ku ulangi segala kesilapan yang pernah ku lakukan. Bukan niatku untuk melakukannya. Tapi bila perasaan hati terlalu sayang, cemburuku muncul bermaharaja lela di seluruh pelusuk tubuh ini.

Sayang,
Aku amat menyangi dirimu. Akan ku lakukan segalanya demi untukmu. Kalau saja, ku mampu memberikan separuh dari hidupku padamu, akan ku berikan lebih agar dirimu hidup lebih lama dari diriku. Sayang, cintamu terlalu agung buat diriku. Kau ibarat permata yang tersembunyi di lautan padang pasir.

Sayang,
Jarak yang memisahkan antara kita terlalu kejam. Hari demi hari, air mataku berderai membasahi pipi. Ku seringkali gagal mengawal emosi diri ini. Maafkan diriku sayang. Segala kenangan yang pernah kita sulam bersama akanku abadikan disudut hati ini, buat tatapan diriku di dunia yang lain.

Sayang,
Maafkan aku, kerana aku terpaksa pergi jauh darimu. Kita tidak mungkin akan bersama lagi buat selamanya. Aku terlalu penat memutarkan roda kehidupan ini. Suda tiba masanya untuk aku menghentikan putaran roda ini dan berehat buat selamanya. Terlalu sukar bagi diriku untuk merungkai satu per satu, namun itulah yang akan kulakukan. Kita akan terpisah and kita akan berada di dua dunia yang berbeza. Hanya hembusan bayu yang mampu kukirimkan untuk dirimu.

Sayang,
Ku pinta agar kau melupakan diriku untuk selamanya. Jangan disimpan kenangan yang ada antara kita. Anggap saja kenangan-kenangan itu ibarat mimpi yang akan hilang kala kau bangun di waktu pagi. Semoga kau akan menemui kekasih yang lebih indah dihatimu. Biarlah ku mengundur diri. Ku korbankan diri ini demi kebahagianku. Walaupun perit dan derita, namun akan ku hadapinya dangan cara yang kupilih ini.

Sayang,
Deruan angin terlalu merdu memangil namaku untuk menghentikan roda kehidupan ini. Dedaunan melambai kegirangan menyambut pemergianku. Ombak berhempasan kencang menyeru pemergianku. Hujan semakin lebat memaksa diriku melangkah ke dunia baru. Dengupan jantungku semakin kencang melihat darah di lenganku. Jari jemariku terketar ketar menahan kesakitan. Bibir merahku berubah warna. Pandanganku semakin kabur. Keringatku terus membasahi tubuhku yang semakin kaku.

Sayang,
Maafkan aku segala kesilapan yang pernah kulakukan padamu. Terimalah salam kemaafan ku yang terakhir buat dirimu. Maafka aku kerna segala janji-janji yang pernah kita cipta hanya menjadi kenangan. Tapi diri ini terlalu sakit dan derita setiap kali ku mengorak langkahku. Aku terlalu sakit sayang. Aku terlalu penat. Selamat tinggal sayangku....relakan pemergianku.

Current mode: Feel sad. Are going to leave your beloved one?

I was so tired today

OK guys, how are you all? I hope everything is OK witj you all. Let me tell you something. Well, nothing actually but i just want to tell you all that i was so tired today and i got jet leg. Yeah!!! seriously. I'm not kidding. What i've done today is just crap and silly actually. Well, I got up this morning so late. If i not mistaken it was 10 am I guess. After got up of my bed i had my shower and had my very simple breakfast. Well, so i was thinking of myself. What shall I do for the whole day. So i went to my bed agaian and started up my "machine (laptop)". Oh..one thing, since i bought my new laptop, actually i never use my PC anymore (oh no...pity to my PC).

So..what next? Well...i went to several airway websites and start my survey again. After 20 mins doing my survey i did realize that i cannot request an open ticket via online (what a silly tought of me?). So i said to myself, oh..that means i have to buy it from an agent or go to their counters and ask for an open ticket. Oh shit!! this is redicilous. So i said, OK fine maybe i have to go out to the town. So i get prepare of myself. When i was in the town today, i did realize i am having problem. U know why? I did not know where are these places located. I want to go to MAS first but where to go? And then Singapore airline...but where? Cathy pacific? Gulfair? Emirates airline? Thai airlines? Oh...shit and crap...I really hate to this thing because i really prefer to buy it via online instead of queuing.

Oh..yeah...come on!!! So lastly, i went to shopping complex information and ask them where are these places and how shall I go there. And luckly, I rang my friend and asked him where to go. Oh yes!!! He knows because he had experiences travel around the world before. But, even though he knows, But i still have the difficulties. What was that? Oh..very unlucky because the places are saperated each other and i have to go from here to there and from there to here (if u know what i mean). Huh!!!! what a tiring day huh??? I almost feed up actually because its not easy. Even though the company pay the tickets for me but still very difficult because i have to get the best price (not necessary the cheapest).

So..after done my job for today i got back. Ops..before that i had my early dinner at chinese restaurant and it was about 6.30 pm. Opssss....too early actually. But what to do? Hehehe...so after had my dinner i got back home and went to bed and just thinking about the tickets and my journey. But folks, I didn't buy anything just had my survey..Very..very tired. So far i think i prefer 2 airlines. They are Malaysia Airline and Singapore Airline. For your information Singapore airline is the best airline in 2007 in the world and Malaysia airline was ranked 3rd. I know the price is a bit expensive but...its ok, because the company will pay it.

Anyway....thats it. I'm going to bed now.......bye...

Just a rambling post from me

Huuuu...when i got up this morning, i was so lazy to take off my sleeping blanket on my yummy body (LOL!!). So this morning i was in dilemma, hahahaha..actually i do not know whether i should go to class or not (blame my self coz i know i shouldn't think about it..i know i must go to the IBM class). Well, actually it was silly dilemma. Hahaha..I know i'm not in mood to go to class since yesterday. However, i haven't make up my mind yet.

Actually the reasons are the lecture was so boring and the lab is so very cold (haven't go to UK yet!!lol!!). So yesterday i was thinking to myself (belum di UK suda mati kesejukan..belum lagi di UK..hahhaa). Anyway, at the end of my silly dilemma i decided not go to class. I dont know..i just feel so lazy and really not in mood to learn something today. I really want to be free and dont want to think anything. I was so tension with my life's dilemma. To take the job offer or to take the master degree offer. Oh shit!!! i hate to think about it. I really hate to think about it. Actually, sometimes i feel regret because i applied the job.

Shit myself if i take the offer or if i take off the offer (nah...another silly alias crap talk frm me). Fuck off!!! sorry i'm "merapu" again today. I didn't mean it but i hate to (i have no choice). So i was on my little matt this morning and my left brain squeezing my right brain to think another things. U know what? Huh!!!! to be honest, i really don't want to leave someone i love if i fly to the UK. But when i rethink about my ambition, it seems like i have to take the offer. Well folks, actually my original plan was to be a lecturer that is why i was so excited to futher my studies.

So yesterday i went to my Prof's office and had some discussion with her regarding to the offer. So i told her everything about the offer and she really encourage me to take the offer, however she adviced me to do some inquiries first. So i met my another lecturer, she is head programme coordinator and discussed the same thing. Oh yeah..i'm tired of it. My brain keep thinking about it every single second. FUCK OFF!!!! I'm tired thinking about it. OK..now my family, i called my mom. And my mom said "ko mo pigi karaja sana england kah? (do you want go to the UK for a job?)...Opss.....i felt dying...my heart "danced"..and i said.."macam mana mami tau?" (moom, how did u know?)...and mom replied "Kakak ko bagitau" (your sister told me)..nah...OMG...why she told mom...why...why...why...!!!!!!

I do not mind, but not the right time to tell my mom and dad yet. I will tell them personally when I get back. So my mom gave me "yellow light" (mom haven't make up her mind yet)...so my sister work as a teacher at KM...she also doesn't agree but at the end of our conversation she said yes (Thanks God). Now my sister who is teacher also at SM John Tuaran. Nah....i got head ace with her..she advised me like i never been advised before. "Mami sama Bapa makin tua tuh..kau lah yang jaga dia sebab ko tuh anak bongsu..." (mom and dad is getting older..you are the one have to take care of them)...nah...dead shit!!!

My sister talking crap to me (maybe there is a truth of it). But i think to myself...i always love my parents and always remember them, but i don't want because of them i have to stay with them and can't go anywhere. I have my future and I have my ambition. I need to start my first step in my life. My sister said "Adik, jauh sangat tuh..inda paya lah ko pi sana...kalau ada apa2 susah nanti ko mau balik". I'm so sorry but most of my sisters are very traditional thinking. I know there is a truth of it, but sometimes we have to be brave in doing something.

We do not know until we tried. If something happened, thst is what we called experience. (Sorry to say but this is my way). So i ask my another sister. She has her own business and she said YES but becareful. She is very sporting and her thought is almost like mine. She is very brave in doing something. Another sister. She is work in HQE KK. Well...this is very different. She said "Bah ambik bah..tapi kalau suda jadi kaya jangan lupa kami..and she laughed" (take it! but do not forget us when getting rich)....i know she is a little bit silly..very open minded actually.

Argh.....made me headace actually!!! So back to my original plan, to be a lecturer..I asked my Prof how mush is the basic salary for lecturer. And she said RM4000 ++. Wow...that is good enough. Master degree's offer letter is in my hand. So what shall i do? Continue study and be a lecturer???? So i think again about my salary if i take the offer...converted to to malaysia currency it is about RM15000(depends on the exchange rate). Wow...thats good money!!! Accomadition and transport will be provided. Good enough i think!! So yesterday and last night i was looking for my flight ticket direct from KL to London. And return way tickets about RM8000 -RM12000. I did checked Malaysia airlines, Cathay pacific, Singapore airlines, British airlines, Emiriates airline.

In fact, some of the airlines will stop at Dubai and also Hong Kong and the to London. Well..i do not mind about the price, because the company will pay for it. But i do mind the very long journey...argh!!!! (scary actually). So i was so tired to think about it and Got up and had my shower this morning. I picked up my dirty chlotes and put into my beg. Hahaha...took the train from shah alam and go to the terminal station. Now i'm currently in the termanal station and waiting my bus. Sorry dudes, i have to be rambler today. I was so boring and i really need to empty my mind. I think this is my longest post I've written.

I'm Lovin' it

Try some...i'm sure you want it more..

My friend just gone to his hometown Johor and he left us "these sweetie". Sorry guys i do not know what is this in english but in Malay we called it as "Asam Jawa". I still remember when i was in primary school i always buy "Asam jawa" and it taste very nice. So when my friend said "ambik ar" means just take it, i really thought i can't eat it anymore. But when i tried it just now it was really nice and now i can't stop my hand to take it again. Hehehehe..I know maybe some of you know this but maybe forgot already. But why dont you all try to find it and try some? hehehe...

I am in dilemma

Huh!! yeah....seriously i am in dilemma. I do not know how to start and how to start this post. But last night when i was laying on my bed my mind chaos and i got head ace thinking about it. I thought after finished my degree i will be free like a bird and will he happier. But!!!! i'm not sad just my mind is thinking like a wheel. I di not know what shall i do next. It is really, really confiusing me. Shall i futher my studies to master degree or find a job!!! If i want to find a job...at where??? in sabah? KL? Penang? Outside of malaysia? OMG!!! If i want to futher my studies for master degree do i think my mind still able to handle it? Or my mind is really tired and need a rest? Oh...no..i got so many questions on my mind and i really can answer all the questions. I mean i can answer it but i just not sure. Now i realize that being a non student is not really happy especially fresh graduate like me. Actually i received a few offers frm companies, but i just can't make any confirm decision at this moment. I emailed them all to give me time to think about it until by the end of this year. Mmmmm.....i know it is really hard to make decision. Because if i did a mistake means it will effect my next paths of my life. I don't know...just not in mood to think about it....I hope God will guide me to make the right decision in my life.

Evervess....good for health

I do not know about evervess before. But since i went to Penang last time, i saw these drink and i started to try it. Firstly, i thought i was OK. Second time i tried it when i was on the bus from penang to Shah alam. I was very tired and so sleepy that time. Lastly i decided to drink it. So i drank it about 30 minutes, i did realise i'm not sleepy anymore and i said to myself..."wow..it was a good drink to avoid u feel sleepy and it seems recover my energy"....hahaha...after that, i started to drink evervess and if you really tired i would like to recommend you because it will recoved you energy. For me this is an alternative drink instead of 100 plus.

Lets Eat.

Lets eat guys
I'm off to KL. Just eat this meal.
Don't shy just eat it.