British English VS Malaysian English

Who says our English is teruk? Just read below - Ours is simple, short, concise, straight-to-the-point, effective etc.

WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS

Britons: I'm sorry, sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.

Malaysians: No stock.

RETURNING A CALL
Britons: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone call for me a few moments ago?

Malaysians: Hello, who call?


ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY
Britons: Excuse me, I would like to get by. Would you please make way?

Malaysians: S-kew me.

WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY
Britons: Hey! Put your wallet away, this drink is on me.

Malaysians: No need lah.

WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION
Britons: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?

Malaysians: (pointing at the door) Can ah?


WHEN ENTERTAINING
Britons: Please make yourself right at home.

Malaysians: No need shy shy one lah!

WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE
Britons: I don't recall you giving me the money.

Malaysians: Where got?

WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER
Britons: I would prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.

Malaysians: Don't want lah.

IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION
Britons: Err...Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand where you're coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you said about the issue.

Malaysians: You mad ah?

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE.
Britons: Excuse me, but could you please lower your voice? I'm trying to concentrate over here.

Malaysians: Shut up lah!

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWS YOU..
Britons: Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for sometime. Do I know you?

Malaysians: See what, see what?

WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION.
Britons: We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the moment..

Malaysians: Die lah!!


WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED
Britons: Will someone tell me what has just happened?

Malaysians: What happened ah? Why like that one lah?

WHEN SOMEONE DID SOMETHING WRONG
Britons: This isn't the way to do it. Here, let me show you.

Malaysians: Like that also don't know how to do!

WHEN ONE IS ANGRY
Britons: Would you mind not disturbing me?

Malaysians: Celaka you!

My life Vs Programming Language

JUST FOR FUN (those who knows programming language they know what i mean)
Public andrikLife (string condition)
{
string busyness;
if (semester == '3')
{busyness="interview + documentation";
condition = 'ok';
return condition;}
else if (semester == '4')
{busyness="Interview + documentation + 9_subjects + dev_of_eproperty_system";
condition = 'frustrated';
return condition;}
else if (semester == '5')
{busyness="documentation + research_proposal + dev_of_eproperty_system (testingStage)+ dev_of_JavaGame";
condition = 'trauma';
return condition;}
else if (semester=='6')
{busyness="Assignments+ finalReport+Thesis+System+learnNewProgrammingLanguage+LearnNewSyntx";
condition = 'dead';
return condition;}

else
{ var busyness=0;
condition = 'happiness';
return condition;}
}

System.out.println("Your current condition is"+ currentCondition.andrikLife(condition))+"!!!";
exit();

So what is the output???? ok..the output is "Your current condition is dead!!!"

Count the black dots!!

Funny Picture Graphic Comments

Just for laugh

A: very easy to fall in love with
B: single
C: hot
D: never let people tell you what to do
E: hot
F: very strong hands
G: a smile to die for
H: a smile to die for
I: beautiful
J: very good sagger
K: makes people laugh
L: everybody loves you
M: very hot
N: has one of the best personalities ever
O: popular with all sorts of people
P: an animal lover
Q: ugly
R: very good kisser
S: has beautiful eyes
T: bangable
U: judgemental
V: yucks!
W: loves it
X: great kisser
Y: really adorable
Z: easy to fall in love with

How about your name?

My reactions when i see a women naked in front of me

Here are some possible reaction of me if i see a women naked in front of me.

1. Hahahahahahaha....you are crazy!!
2. Can i suck your nipples?
3. May i see your "holly hole"?
4. Are you still virgin?
5. Wow..you are sexy (if she is sexy)
6. Wow...what the hell u are? you are fat (if she is fat)
7. Why don't you shave your "ugly hair" ?
8. Your "tuttt..tuttt" looks burned...
9. I thought you feel shy. Don't you feel shy?
10. FUCK..you are ugly (if she is ugly)
11. WOW....you are yummy (if she is beautiful)
12. And the last but not least...Ish..kurudot sudah!!! like cabbage bunga?

Funny message

Hahahahaha...after long time i didn't check my Friendster account (i thought don't have account), lastly i checked it just now and i got this message from my friend. Actually not from him, he just forward to me. Very, very funny actually!

Hi, my name is Razif Kuda Borhanuddin. I am 19 years old.I am UTP (Univercity of Petronas) student and I have severe lung cancer from second hand smoke. I also have a large tumor in my brain, from repeated beatings. doctors say I will die soon if this isn't fixed, and my family can't pay the bills.The Make A Wish Foundation, has agreed to donate 7 cents for very time this message is sent on. For those of you who send this along, I thank you so much, but for those who don't send it, what goes around comes around. Have a Heart, please send this. Please, if you are a kind person, send this on.

Bull shit lah!!!

Posotif prove of global warming

hello guys...I just submitted my research proposal today and just and wait next semester. I've struggled so much for my studies this semester because my pointer was downed so much last semester. After my very unexpected result last two semesters, i didn't put too much effort on my studies last semester. So....the effect of that...my result downed (but still unexpected actually...because i thought it was really worst). I still remember, last semester, when my friend Oman told me the result has been announced i got up of my lunch and checked my result. Dowing!!!!Dowing!!! Gosh!! still unexpected actually but not as good as the previous semester. But never mind, I'm sure i will got it back this semester. Except...something wrong with my luck..LOL!! Actually nothing so much, I just want to share you all with this funny picture illustrates how the global warming became more serious and here is the prove.

so what do you think? is it trend? or style? or the prove of global warming? LOL!