This year has been a very very sad of me when someone who i used to love very much left me behind. We used to share all the sweet memories and all the good things in life. In fact we used to cry and laugh together for every single thing we did. But last Sunday was terrible for me and i just don’t know how am I going to live my life without my lover. That fucking email really hurt me very very much and i almost lost my life because of the email. It was very very sad of my life and i don’t know how to explain it by words or even verbally. I always thought i will have a forever relationship with this guy but i was wrong and i hated the fact that i always wrong in relationship matters.
I thought my life has been destroyed and never want to live my life anymore. This pain really killing me softly and i am speechless for everything. I can’t think properly and I just cannot do all the things that i used to do. Oh my God!!!! Help me in this.......
Now I know why some people do drink! Yes I do know now and now i know why some people do get drunk when they drink. I did it last night and it was not what i really want but i had to do it. So I did it and I was fucking drunk last night. I puked on the bed and also on the floor. I am very disappointed not only with myself but also with the person who left me behind. When i got up this morning i had hangover and needed some rest. I got up at 10 am this morning and had my simple breakfast. I was not hungry at all and i was not in a mood.
I wish i never met that fucking person in my life. But i was so fool because i trusted the person like hell. I am still very sad at the moment and i hope to recover very soon before am off to Paris. Argh...this is my fucking life. I can be very strong and i can do anything whatever I want but not to cope with love things. I hate love but how can human resist love?
P/s: updating from London on the train going back to luton